It’s safe to say that raising children is ten times more challenging than it appears to be. Most people go into parenthood with pretty unrealistic expectations, thinking it will all be sunshine and rainbows. Unfortunately, that isn’t always the case. While there’s no shortage of love and happiness that comes along with being a parent, there are also plenty of ways in which you can screw up. One of the worst things you can do as a parent is raise a child who resents you.
However, you need not worry because Jonah Engler is here to educate and guide you.
Common Reasons Why Children Grow Up To Resent Their Parents
You’re constantly putting them down
One of the quickest ways to make your child resent you is by constantly putting them down and critiquing them for petty things. Whether it’s in an effort to motivate them or simply because you’re in a bad mood, putting your child down is only going to make them feel worse about themselves.
You never listen to them
Do you ever feel like your children are talking to a brick wall while trying to communicate with you? If so, it’s no wonder they may resent you. Jonah Engler emphasizes the importance of always taking out the time to listen to what your children have to say and hearing their concerns, even if it seems trivial.
You compare them to others
Comparing your child to others is a surefire way to make them feel inferior and resentful. Whether it’s their sibling, a family friend, or even a celebrity kid, constantly comparing them to others will only damage their self-esteem.
You’re always critical
If you’re the type of parent who is quick to point out your child’s flaws, you may want to rethink your approach. No one likes to be constantly critiqued, especially not a child. If you’re always nitpicking at them and always judging their every move, your children will eventually resent you.
You play favorites
If you have more than one child, you must treat them all equally. Playing favorites is a surefire way to make your other children feel left out and resentful.
You neglect their feelings
It’s important always to consider your child’s feelings, even if you don’t necessarily agree with them. If you regularly dismiss or ignore their feelings, they will start feeling like their opinions and concerns hold no value in your eyes.
You’re too strict
While it’s important to set boundaries and have rules, being too strict isn’t going to do your child any favors. If you’re always making them toe the line, they’re bound to resent you for it eventually.
You’re never there for them
Between work, errands, and social obligations, it’s easy to let your child fall by the wayside. But if you’re never there for them when they need you, they’re bound to resent you eventually.
Bottom Line
According to Jonah Engler, if you are worried that your child may resent you, take a step back and assess your parenting style. If you find yourself making any of the above mistakes, it’s time to make some changes. Your child’s well-being is always worth more than your pride.
