All parents, regardless of their personal circumstances, want their children to receive the very best in life. They want their little ones to grow up in safe, nurturing environments where they can thrive and reach their full potential. But a child’s mental health can suffer greatly when parents can’t seem to get along. It can destabilize their life, making them feel unloved and uncertain of their future.
Jonah Engler emphasizes that if you’re going through a divorce, it’s important to do everything you can to shield your children from its negative impacts.
8 Tips to Safeguard Your Children During a Divorce
- Avoid badmouthing your ex in front of your children. No matter how tempting it may be to vent about your ex’s shortcomings, it’s important to resist the urge. Your children love and value both their parents and don’t want to hear one parent being disparaged.
- Encourage separate time with each parent. Even if you’re not on the best of terms with your ex, it’s important to encourage quality time between your children and their other parent. If possible, try to be flexible about visitation schedules so that your kids can spend plenty of time with both parents.
- Make sure your children know they’re not responsible for the divorce. It’s common for children of divorced parents to blame themselves for the split. Reassure your kids that the divorce is not their fault and that both mom and dad still love them very much.
- Focus on creating a stable home life. A divorce can be a big adjustment for kids, so it’s important to do what you can to create a stable home life. Try to keep routines as consistent as possible and provide plenty of love and support.
- Don’t bring new significant others immediately into the picture. It can be confusing and hurtful for children to see their parents with new partners. Wait until you’re sure your relationship is serious before introducing your kids to your new partner.
- Refrain from using your children as messengers. Using your kids as a way to communicate with your ex can be tempting, but this is unfair to them. They should not be put in the middle of your conflict.
- Don’t make major changes in your children’s lives. During a divorce, it’s important to maintain some sense of stability for your kids. Avoid making any big decisions, such as moving to a new house or changing schools, during this time.
- Jonah Engler believes that seeking out support is vital as a divorce can be an emotionally difficult time for everyone involved. Make sure to seek out support from friends, family, or a therapist if you’re struggling to cope.
- Keep communication open with your children. Although you may not be on good terms with your ex, keeping the lines of communication open with your children is important. This way, they can come to you with any questions or concerns they may have.
Jonah Engler emphasizes that no one’s perfect, and there will undoubtedly be some bumps along the road. But if you handle the situation with care and caution, you can avoid doing further damage to your children’s emotional well-being.