Whether you are a child or an adult, trauma can have a lasting effect on your mental, emotional and physical health. People who experience trauma or dysfunction in their childhood are likely to manifest that in their adulthood. This is because trauma hinders their ability to understand and perceive emotions differently, which impacts their behavior in certain aspects of life. One thing that suffers the most through it all is their relationship.
People with a history of trauma perceive relationships differently than others because their way of expressing and receiving love is different. This usually forms a behavioral pattern that is evident in every relationship they have during their adulthood. While most people don’t realize this, trauma has grave consequences and significantly affects adulthood relationships.
Therefore, today Jonah Engler decided to share some common ways childhood traumas manifest in adulthood relationships. You can take note of these behavioral patterns to identify someone who has previously been through trauma.
Jonah Engler: Ways Childhood Trauma Manifests in Adulthood Relationships
Have Attachment Issues
This is the biggest giveaway for someone who has had a traumatic lifestyle. People with a history of trauma tend to show attachment issues in their adult life. They either get too attached or find it too hard to get attached.
When people get too attached to their partner, it often starts reflecting their insecurities, making them possessive and eventually bitter about their relationship. On the other hand, some people also tend to find it hard to show attachment and distance themselves from the person or their relationship in fear of getting attached. This also indicates a traumatic childhood where they might have been betrayed by someone they dearly trusted – specifically their parents.
Cannot Express Feelings
Having to hear your partner express their feelings for you or be upfront and talk about their emotions is very important in a relationship. But people who grow up in uncertain environments tend to keep their guards up at all times. They often try to form a wall around their emotions, making it hard for them to express how they feel and for their partner to understand their feelings. This is why Jonah Engler says such people need to get over their traumas to learn how to speak for themselves.
Need “Too Much” Space
Giving your partner their personal space in a relationship is very important for both of you. But if your partner seems to ask for too much space and personal time, then this might be a sign f childhood trauma. People with a traumatic background are used to spending time alone and do not like sharing their space with anyone else. This becomes difficult when they are in a relationship because they require too much space and time for themselves only. In such cases, Jonah Engler advises you should give your partner their space and make them feel safe around you.
Jonah Engler: Dealing with Childhood Trauma
Childhood trauma has a significant impact on someone’s adult life, which is why Jonah Engler believes it is essential for people to make sure they overcome their traumas as soon as possible. If you are someone with a traumatic childhood, trust your partner and try to heal with their help. Otherwise, it can negatively impact your adulthood relationships.